Reflections with Neycha:
In Susan Taylor's Words

I am Planet Rock, 777-9311, Purple-Rain-Prince-old.  Unashamed and still “feeling myself” because that’s what I was taught to do - by a super-woman, single mom who gifted our home with Essence magazine monthly.   God bless her!  Back then, this black woman’s bible of sorts offered striking portraits of beauty, humanity and an authentic blackness for which we could all feel proud.

 

For me however, the most significant contribution came in the form of the sacred text written by the magazine’s chief editor Susan L. Taylor in a monthly column called In the Spirit.   As I wrote to introduce our “In Flow with Susan Taylor” feature article this month, her words became for me a living monument of womanhood, creativity, humanity and the certified badass I aspired to be.

 

All these years later, as the instigator of personal revolutions that both Susan and mom’s words groomed me to be - and author of this column, I sit for every issue to reflect on the themes handed me by my editor.  I ponder the experiences occurring in my own life and search for the piercing insights worth extracting to share them here with you.  Instead, for this “New Year, New You” issue, I humbly yield this space to share words from one of my greatest inspirations:  Susan L. Taylor.

 

From our interview, Ms. Taylor in her own words:

 

On change

Life is change. Whether it's a change in finances, relationships, housing, career, losing our parents, becoming a parent, it is all change.  To resist it, is to resist the natural flow of life.  It's like trying to go upstream when the river flows downstream. 

 

On guidance and getting quiet

The Holy Spirit is always speaking to us, but we can’t hear what life is pushing us to do because of the cacophony in the world that's always beating at our door, and the fear that overwhelms us.

 

 

On being authentic and doing the work 

We can't be anybody else.  We have to do the work, the inner work, and know that's a lifelong opportunity to come to know our ever-changing and evolving selves. 

 

You know Terry McMillan has opened the doors widely for black women to believe that they could write novels. Thank you, Terry, because we can, but we also need to learn how to write, to not step out there without the learning, without the practice.  

 

On faith  

Life may knock you down, but it's not going to knock you out.  You get back up.  Dust yourself off, and put one foot in front of the other.  When you do that, the Holy Spirit gives you wings.  I see that now.  If you begin to knit, God will give you the yarn.  You just have to begin. 

 

On rituals

I have a little ritual that I do every morning.  I think before we get out of bed we have to put a smile on our face and realize that not everything in our life is going to be perfect today.  It's never going to be perfect.  That's not life.

 

On aspiration 

Life means that we're always reaching for something in some arena - whether financial, relationships, how we parent, how we build a business or our health.  There's always something that we're striving for.  It’s that urge that keeps us moving forward. 

 

On forgiveness, self-compassion and self-care  s

We need to practice forgiveness, every day.   That's what God's love is.  We can say it. We can talk about it.  We can try to encourage other people to do it, but it's as simple as the practice of saying to ourselves, "Nope, I'm not going to burn the candle on both ends.  I'm not going to stay up until 3am in the morning and then try to get up at 7am and try to be kind to my children because I won't be."

 

I love the way that Gandhi put it:  "If I don't give myself what I need, I won't love you well."  We have to love ourselves well, first.

 

See “In Flow with Susan” to read or listen to the full interview.